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Writer's pictureD. Pylarinou

Red Flags in a Relationship: What to Look Out For

Updated: Nov 11

Relationships should make you feel happy, supported, and loved. But sometimes, there are warning signs, or “red flags,” that something might not be right. These red flags can be small at first, but they often point to bigger problems down the road. Here are some common red flags to watch out for in a relationship.


1. Lack of Respect

If your partner doesn’t respect your boundaries, feelings, or opinions, that’s a big red flag. Respect is the foundation of any healthy relationship. Disrespect can show up in many ways, like constantly interrupting you, making fun of you, or ignoring your wishes.


2. Controlling Behavior

A partner who tries to control what you do, who you see, or how you live your life is showing unhealthy behavior. This might include telling you who you can be friends with, checking your phone, or deciding what you should wear. Everyone deserves freedom and trust in a relationship.


3. Isolation

Does your partner keep you away from friends and family? If they make you feel guilty for spending time with others, that’s a warning sign. Isolation can make you dependent on them and leave you without support.


4. Constant Criticism

It’s normal to give and receive feedback in a relationship, but constant criticism is harmful. If your partner always finds fault with you—whether it’s about your appearance, your work, or your personality—it can damage your self-esteem. A partner should lift you up, not bring you down.


5. Jealousy and Possessiveness

A little jealousy can happen in relationships, but extreme jealousy or possessiveness is a red flag. If your partner accuses you of cheating or becomes angry when you spend time with others, it shows a lack of trust. Trust is key to a healthy relationship.


6. Gaslighting

Gaslighting is when someone tries to make you doubt your own reality. For example, your partner might say, “You’re imagining things,” or “That never happened,” even when you know it did. This is a form of emotional manipulation and can make you feel confused and powerless.


7. Emotional or Physical Abuse

Any kind of abuse—whether emotional, physical, or verbal—is a serious red flag. Emotional abuse can include insults, threats, or making you feel worthless. Physical abuse includes hitting, pushing, or any form of violence. No one should ever feel afraid of their partner.


8. Lack of Communication

Healthy relationships rely on good communication. If your partner avoids talking about important issues, shuts down during conversations, or refuses to listen to your concerns, this can lead to bigger problems later on. Communication helps build understanding and connection.


9. Dishonesty

Trust is built on honesty. If your partner lies often, hides things from you, or is secretive about their actions, it can be a sign of deeper issues. Being honest with each other creates a strong bond in the relationship.


10. Feeling Unhappy

Finally, trust your gut. If you often feel sad, anxious, or uncomfortable around your partner, something might be wrong. A healthy relationship should bring you joy, peace, and security—not stress or fear.


If you notice any of these red flags in your relationship, it’s important to take them seriously. Talk to someone you trust, seek support, or consider speaking to a professional. Everyone deserves to be in a relationship where they feel respected, loved, and safe.

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